Dead men walking....

Spiritual Deaths

John 9:33-41 (Spiritual Blindness)
VS. 41
Jesus said,” If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains.”

Last night I sang at a church in Dunedin. It was funny, we actually had a hard time finding it because it was located in what used to be a bar…. We like unconventional! After a quick sound check and a short brief with the pastor, they began the service. As I normally always do to “get in the zone,” I went outside to get my thoughts together. Any speaker/pastor will tell you that they like to have a general idea of what they want to speak on before they go up. So I began praying and rehearsing different points that I wanted to bring out about the “New Year” and how I was looking forward to it. Well any pastor/speaker will also tell you that there are times when the Holy Spirit steps in and kind of “re-directs” if you will. God did one of those RD’s last night.

I am not sure if I have even ever referenced a “spiritual death” in my life, but I sure did last night! (In an overview of the events of 2008.) This last year has presented many valleys for me. In fact, I joke that I cried more in the past year than the 22 years prior - combined! I think that the most discouraging event was watching someone who was very close to me turn away from God. For some reason, I felt compelled to share this last night - it feels like a death to me. I know, and you know how much joy we find in the Lord and then to witness someone who has experienced joy, glory and the presence of God-to watch them walk away is as if they would rather die, than have life!

To some of you, this may seem dramatic, but to others of you, you may know what it feels like. I feel like I mourn for someone that is a “dead man walking.” I observe what is left of his soul and it is sad. He has tried so hard to break that covenant with God that he is walking around with a sense of “torn flesh” and a wounded spirit. A wise pastor once told me that “hurt people, hurt people.” And he has been very successful at not only hurting others but himself as well!

I say all of this to say that death is death, no matter which forms it takes. No matter if someone chooses to live in the darkness or happens to live in a casket. But the beauty of them not already being “however many feet under,” is that there is still a chance for them to experience “truly living!”

I encourage all of you, no matter if you know someone that has experienced grace, or someone that cannot even seem to wrap their brain or heart around it…Keep Praying! We may be the only ones that show them God’s love and promises! I pray that 2009 is a year of true visibility!

I praise you God for restoration and “re-directions!”

Rendered Heart,
Christina

Change, are you ready?

I do not know too many people that embrace change, that embrace new ideas, different lifestyles other than their own-and so on. But there is a certain beauty that comes with change-it’s called growth. How can anyone grow without change? A seed cannot grow if it stays within the comforts of its bag that it was purchased in… Then, think about what that seed has to go through to become anything. It must break from within, and penetrate its walls of safety. Then it must endure its lonely journey to the surface. You would think that the worst of it would be over, but its not. After it reaches you and I, it must survive rain, sun, snow heavy feet and careless animals-the list goes on. But think about the tree that survives. Think about the mighty oak tree in your minds eye-It is strong, sturdy, and able to withstand almost anything. But why? Because of constant change and growth, that tree is now a source of shade, food, oxygen and a beautiful image on God’s canvas.

I would love to stay within my “little bag” and not be forced to penetrate the walls of which I refer to as “safety.” I would sometimes rather watch nature happen, instead of be a part of it. But today is a new day, A day meant to be different than yesterday and thankfully God does not expect me to do it my by myself. Today is meant for me to dig deep within my inner being and allow God to nurture my own growth. To rid myself of distractions and anything else that could interfere with that process. This is a time for me to renew who I am in Christ, a time for rediscovery, a time for pruning, a time for CHANGE….

……………..………………………Transformation is on the horizon!


Live out loud,

Christina

What's in a name?

Well I have been told for a very long time that I needed to look into "blogging." It all started with Xanga, which did not last long, because MySpace took the world by storm. Then between Facebook, Twitter, and trying to find time...So here it goes....

I noticed that everyone calls their blog something that describes them on a day to day basis or at least communicates what they want people to take from reading their blog. The naming process actually came to me after reading a verse in: Joel 2:13 that says “And rend your heart and not your garments. Now return to the LORD your God, for He is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in loving kindness and relenting of evil.”

I must be honest, I was intrigued by the word “rend” and what it meant, so I looked it up and this is what I found:

Rend: To become torn or split.
Rendered: To give or make available
-or- To represent in a drawing or painting, especially in perspective.

This verse reinstates the importance to me of having an open heart in front of the Lord. The last couple years of my life have not played out the way that I thought that they would, but I can honestly say that I have felt the Holy Spirit day by day. Let’s face it, it hurts when flesh is torn, but in the same way as God begins to penetrate our lives and sever off things that are not useful, we begin to grow- We are becoming more effective followers of Jesus Christ. With out sacrifice there can be no serving!

I hope that over time I will effectively “represent” my heart to you. Thank you in advance for taking the time to be a part of my new journey, I am looking forward to it …

Rendered Heart,

Christina