We have a zoo in Tampa, called Lowery Park Zoo. Because we also have Busch Gardens in Tampa, we rarely went . You see-Busch Gardens is the zoo plus cool rides and good food. But I can remember one of these few occasions at Lowery Park Zoo, being absolutely mesmerized by one of their souvenir machines. After I was done pestering Mom and Dad for a dollar, I feed the machine and it allowed me to witness grey wax-like material being poured into extremely hot metal molds-and after, I got to take with me a cheap sacrament of my day. Normally something like this would make it home and shortly after the "new smell" wore off, it would be thrown into the toy bin.
I heard a great quote once by Les and Leslie Parrott:
"If you try to find intimacy with another person before achieving a sense of identity on your own, all of your relationships become an attempt to complete yourself."
In other words, you have to become a whole person, before you become half of a relationship. I can tell you with all of the years that I have been in "youth ministry," and teaching "Wait Training" in Hillsborough County Schools, I have seen some pretty empty faces. Sad to say, but there are equally as many girls my age dealing with the same types of issues-And in the end they become more shattered than when they started the relationship.
So how do we fix it? How do we not become "that guy" or "that girl?" WE SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES! If you are close to me, you are probably thinking, "Oh there goes Christina with her psych talk!" But hear me out, Aren't boundaries attractive? Think about when you were a kid and you would push and push until-a boundary was established. Because believe it or not, God designed us to desire limits. I always tell people that "When someone tells me their expectations, they are setting me up for success!"
Individuals whether it be relationally or romantically are attracted to people that know what they want out of life, that know that their life stands for more than just "taking up space." These people are known for having a "sense of direction" and self control...I say all this to say, it may not seem like a conscious decision to "mold" to what someone else wants...but remember it is our choices and lack of boundaries that get us there...
How many times have you witnessed someone being poured into a cheap mold called "loneliness," to feel complete? They are so badly craving to be something/someone of purpose, but they end up in the bottom of someone's "toy bin." So keep your dollar and let the world buy their cheap toy elsewhere!
Galatians 5:16-26
16 So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17 For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
